Emily

Dear Blog,
This year I have been so confused. I lost all reasons for why I should even try anymore. I got so tired of failing. I got tired of being me. I got tired of trying and trying and trying. I realize now that I try for many reasons. Mainly I try for my future husband and for my future kids. They deserve the best, so I give my best. It looks as though I will be here in arkansas for at least the next year. This will probably be best. Despite the fact that I am 18 and can live on my own, even though I can get by, I am not ready to leave my parents nor my siblings. They mean the world to me. I'm not ready to get married either. So time is probably the best thing I can do for myself right now. Will i be the same person a year from now? I highly doubt that. Prom is this friday. I am pretty excited to go. I have a good dress that I really like, and my date is my one of my best friends. My brother is taking my other best friend:) I couldn't ask for more than to spend prom with my two best friends who just happen to be mormon, and my other best friend my brother:) I'm finally starting to see that my parents are trying to help me, not take away my freedom... funny how it took so long to realize this. I don't know where my life is going, I don't know when I'll get married, what degree I'll get, or when I'll be expecting my third child, but I do know this... my parents are gonna help me every step of the way. As for church, my primary class is going great, I am loving working with these little children, teaching them the simple doctrines of our church. I graduate May 20th, 2011. Thats in no time at all. It's crazy how sometimes it feels like you aren't moving fast enough, and other times it feels as though time flies too fast. Today I am glad that I am not alone. God gave me the best parents I could ask for. It took awhile for me to build up the trust, but I sure do love them, and I couldn't ask for more. Love, Emily Lynn♥