New Job

Hey everybody! I am in a great mood today. We had a three day weekend and I spent most of it with Aaron. The other part of the weekend I was sleeping and working lol. I got a new job, and I really love it. It is not physically demanding and time goes by. Plus I get money:). For those of you who I haven't talked to yet I'll tell you a little bit about what I do. I am a credit consultant. I talk to people who have low credit scores for various reasons, and give them suggestions on how they could improve their scores. 70 percent of credit reports have mistakes in them. If the people I talk to have negative items on their credit reports, and they have some form of positive credit(checking account, debit card, credit card) then I refer them to Lexington Law Firm. Lexington challenges the credit bureaus and if in 30 days the credit bureaus can't prove the validity of the things Lexington challenges, then they must remove the items from the credit report. I like my job because there are a lot of people who have been screwed over when it comes to their credit report, and I really feel like I can help them out. If they don't qualify for Lexington then I can connect them to someone who can help them through Debt Consolidation, Debt Settlement, Bankruptcy, Tax Relief, etc. I had to take a week of training and pass a test to get this job so now I know a bit about credit:) enough to be a credit consultant anyways. Negative Items on your credit report make up the biggest percentage of your score. New positive credit only makes up 10 percent. That's crazy isn't it. I think the positive should have more effect on your credit score but whatever. There are three credit agency's. Transunion, Equifax, and Experian. Your credit report is the average of these three scores. Anyways enough about credit I am sure I am boring you. I am in American Foundations right now and we are watching a movie. We are half way through the semester. I have got to get my grades up. They are all pretty good online but I fear they will go down if my teacher ever updates the scores. For my candy-making class I have to make a centerpiece project. It is due in two days and I haven't even started. I couldn't decide what I wanted to do, but I think I know now. I am going to make a vase with roses in it. Hopefully it will turn out and not look too bad. It is definitely going to take some after class extra work though. I think I am going to do the roses at home, and get my roommates to help me out. I'll make the plastic chocolate and they can help me form it into roses. I think I will use Marzipan for the vase. Well I seem to have gotten two new best friends while I have been here. I get along with both of them so well I wonder how I went my whole life without knowing them. Tauni Ackerman is the first one. We have a lot of similarities, and she is just so fun to hang around with. She is super loving and accepting. The other is Aaron. I know I have talked a lot about him so I won't say much but let me just say that I don't think I have ever gotten along so well with anyone in my entire human life. You would like him a lot. I don't think you could not like him, he is just that awesome. :) Well I have another hour in this class so I think I will work on my science homework for tomorrow. Love ya!! =D

Aaron Brent Vernon is absolutley adorable!! =D

Ok this is going to be a quick post because I am really tired and have plans in the morning. I was about to go to bed when I realized that I hadn't really blogged about Aaron yet. I thought to myself 'my poor bloggers have no idea about Aaron!' SO I thought I would tell you about him.
Aaron is a boy who seems to have captured my heart. The best word that comes to mind when I think of him is absolutley "adorable". He is the sweetest thing in the world. He is so genuine and innocent. Today we hung out after work at his place and made cookies blindfolded lol. Let me tell you, he was adorable. I was trying to figure out what exactly it was that made him so different. There are many things let me assure you, but I finally realized what was so different about him. He has never had his heart broken therefore he trusts completely. He gives his all. The thing that makes me like him the best is that he likes being with me. We hold hands when we walk but he is not one of those guys that has to be touching all the time. I can't even explain him because he is so utterly different from EVERY other boy I've met in my life. Even though he is really innocent and inexperienced, he is really thoughtful and considerate. His Valentines Day present was SO awesome and thoughtful and he came up with it all by himself. I can't explain how much he wows me. Today I didn't even wear make-up around him and it didn't bother me at all. He doesn't really wear name brand clothing which I LOVE about him, everything about him shouts how perfect he is. You can tell that he is not big on material things but on things like family and traveling and stuff like that. He is so amazing. Best thing of all, he doesn't scare me, or drive me crazy lol. The other day I stuck out my hand while we were walking, in an obvious motion for him to hold my hand and he high-fived it lol. Then I told him to hold my hand and he was embarrassed, it was so cute. It just shows you how his mind works. He always makes me laugh. And most importantly he respects me. He is super patient when I don't understand something and helps me figure it out. He helped me study for a test the other day and can I just say: Best study partner ever!!! Not only did he help me remember things but I was super nervous and he made jokes, making me laugh and lightening my nerves. He doesn't try to impress me, at least not obviously lol, he is just straightforwardly himself. I love everything about him. Tomorrow he is going to make me breakfast, help me write my talk, and play badmitten. We started going steady and hanging out every day, and usually if I hang out with a guy consecutivly they drive me crazy but suprisingly the more I hang out with him the more I like him. Today we skyped my family and he loved them, he thought they were hilarious, I couldn't help but think that he would fit right in. I am pretty sure they liked him too:) Well I could go on for hours but I really am tired. The poin I am trying to make in this blog post is this: Aaron is absolutley adorably amazing. I like him a lot! I don't know how I got lucky enough for him to like me but he does and I am welcoming it whole-heartedly! I really hope nothing goes wrong because he is so amazing I honestly don't want to lose him. Well Love ya'll! Good Night!

Its already half way through the semester believe it or not. I have 4 A's and one B at the time. I am pretty sure I'll have 2 B's by the time my teacher updates our grades though. I have learned something about myself. I can not really be happy without my depression meds. I went off it hoping I could be like a regular person and just be happy with life. It didn't work. I was a complete wreck. I noticed that every single day I was down. At first I just thought it was because of certain events but then I realized that every little thing made me upset. I thought about how depression has to do with your brain and automatically looking at things negatively. So I begrudingly took it again on thursday night and the effects were immediate. Friday I was in a great mood. Today was good too. I hate that I have depression it makes me feel weak, but I do have it and the only thing I can do about it is take medicine to even out the chemicals in my brain.
On friday Aaron taught me how to play raquett ball. That was way fun, I think I need more practice though. Afterwards we ate Taco Bell and then watched my all time favorite movie Fireproof. It was his first chick-flick. He seemed to like it well enough. He is a complete guy. He has 3 brothers and one sister. I personally think he is cute. He has green eyes, his skin is olive toned, and his hair is brown with a little sandy blondish look in it(just a little). He is about 5'8" so not the tallest guy in the world but I like his height. I think I like him but different than the other guys I've liked before. I always thought he was cute for one thing. But I don't look at him and get flattered or nervious or anything. I just have fun with him, like a good friend. I feel like I can be completely honest with him because he likes most of the things I like, like Harry Potter and fantasy books. He is big into Star Wars which reminds me of my dad for some reason. He has a cute sense of humor and we are always joking and laughing. Today I looked at him and asked what time church started for him. He looked at me for a second then said "Are you serious?!" Then I suddenly remembered that we were in the same ward... and the same FHE group. I was SOO embarrassed. We were laughing for quite a while. Lol I can be stupid sometimes but thats ok. Today we played human clue, and then went back to his apartment and played games and ate icecream. We had a lot of fun. He walked me home and once again reminded me of my dad when I went to give him a hug, he gave me a side hug. He is adorable. All my life I've loved those people whose faces blush and get red super easy, and he has one of those faces. He has green eyes too. Anyways, believe it or not I am not obsessed with him or anything. Infact I just love that I get along so great with him. We would have been best friends in high school. I just figured I'd tell ya'll about him since you can't meet him yourself, being so far away ya know. Well church in the morning so chow!

One Great Weekend

Well my weekend started out with me going Latin Dancing with some of my roommates. It was super fun. I have to admit I think I actually like Latin dancing more than country dancing which is crazy cause I am a country girl. I danced with lots of people that night. Some really skilled and others... not so much. One boy I danced with the last three dances. His name is Jonathan. He was charming and patient with my lack of skills as far as Latin dancing goes. He got my number and asked me what I was doing the next day. I told him I was free until 7 because I had a date at 7. So he asked me to go out with him at 4. I came home and watched a chick flick, with the roommates, called "500 Days of Summer". It was a sweet movie. I got to bed around 3 and didn't get up until 11 the next morning. Me and my roommates Kayla and Tauni made pancakes, eggs, and turkey bacon for breakfast. It was nice to have something other than a granola bar for breakfast. Then I took my time getting ready and then went and practiced piano with Kayla. She played a beautiful version of "If You Could Hie to Kolob", I cried it was so beautiful. Then I went back to my apartment and skyped Alex for about 2 minutes and then Jonathan showed up to pick me up. We walked over to his apartment a few blocks away and he had cooked cabbage, onion, quacamole, and all sorts prepared. For the main dish he had the ingredients ready so he could show me how to make it. I can't remember what you call it but it was incredibly good. We played a little fusbal in the lounge and looked at some pictures from his mission (he served in nicaragua and I felt like I was looking at pictures from The Other Side of Heaven because it was so similar). Then it was time to go home. Once I got back to the apartment, I made him some hot chocolate to take home with him so the walk wouldn't be so cold, then he was on his way and I was making sure I looked ok for my next date with Aaron. With Aaron it was a group date with 2 of his roommates. We went bowling on campus in the MC. It was actually really fun and my wrist didn't hurt at all. After the game we all went back to Aarons house and played some games and ate icecream. At the end of the nightI would have to say I really enjoyed both dates. The next day was Sunday and I was at church until 3:15. i was supposed to meet him at his apartment to watch the superbowl at 4. So I booked it home, changed my outfit to something more casual and then headed over to his place. Once we got there we all piled into a car and headed to someones parents house to watch the super bowl. Their house was huge and they had a big tv so we were able to get good seats on the couch and a perfect view. They had all sorts of food there such as tacos, pizza, hot wings, sausages, chips, soda, cookies, etc. It was super fun. After the superbowl we went back to campus and went stadium singing which is when you go sing hymns outside at the stadium. This is really fun to do but it is super duper cold! After stadium singing we went back to my apartment and he helped me do my Book of Mormon homework. It was in 2 Nephi, and it was the teachings of Isaiah. I found it quite confusing but he was very patient and helped me understand it. Then he had to head back to make it in time for curfew. So that was my awesome weekend. Lol hope you liked it mom and Alex cause I wrote it for you:)
P.S. Since I know you are asking the question I'll just tell you now that I really like this guy. I know if you met him you would really like him. He is kind and generous. He talks in a cute accent. I can't find one bad thing about him so far, nor have I heard a negative comment come out of his mouth. He is a a little goofy and carefree. Yes he really is from Guatemala. Tomorrow we are going to devotional together which should be fun since I usually go by myself, it will be nice to sit by someone I know rather than some stranger who is looking at me funny. Well I am super tired and have quite the day tomorrow so I'm off to bed. Love ya'll!!

The Truth About College...

The truth about college is this. It is super duper expensive. It is really fun. It is awesome living around other Mormons. The classes are amazing. Mentally college is great. Physically college sucks. No matter how much sleep I get at night I don't have energy for the next day. You get to walk everywhere which is great but can be mighty cold sometimes. I honestly like walking everywhere though. I think my dad must have gotten his love for walking from his college days. Physically I am dying. I don't understand why. I am more exhausted than I have ever been in my life. And it doesn't end. It is so frustrating. I don't know how I will ever make it once I start my new job. Here is to perseverance...

Dear Blog,
This week I have been overly sensitive. Idk why I just have been. I have been so stressed and frustrated. Tuesday was a perfect day. I had the opportunity to go to a devotional by Elder L. Tom Perry of the quorum of the twelve apostles. I don't think I have ever been so excited for something in my life. The devotional was amazing. I sat about 100 ft. away from him. I couldn't believe I was so lucky. He gave a wonderful speech on how we need to be prepared for this new year and the obstacles that might come from it. He told us how very important it was to have family traditions, as many as we could think of. He said many kids end up doing bad things because they are trying to feel like they are part of something. Elder Perry said that they should feel like they are part of something in their own family, therefore we must have many traditions, traditions in which we involve everyone. Have the kids be in charge of somethings. Make your kids feel like they are part of something in your family. The next day I went to the temple here in Rexburg. It was the first time for me to go here in Rexburg. The temple is soooo beautiful! It is soo big too! Compared to the temple in Memphis anyways. Then I came home and went grocery shopping. I finally rented the movie "The Help". I came home and watched it and bawled through half the movie. Once the movie ended I couldn't stop crying. It was ridiculus. I didn't know what had come over me. Finally I calmed myself down and said a quiet prayer thanking Heavenly Father that I wasn't alive when people were so utterly cruel to African Americans. Then I got myself prettied up to go country dancing. Me and Kayla headed over there and then Jake decided to come to. We missed most of the learning portion so I had no idea what I was doing. I tried hard but in the end made myself look like a fool. Everyone else there could dance like no other. Even Jake and Kayla could dance. I asked how they had learned these dances and they said from school and stake dances. I tried to explain to them how they didn't have dance classes at my school and that the dances are all nasty dancing. At stake dances you really only slow dance. I left that day determined to go home and youtube dances so I could do better next week. Thursday I was still really tired. I went to class and then came back. I did homework and such all day. I knew that Jake would be coming over that night so I made sure I looked ok and stayed up late waiting. His sister Kayla is one of my roommates so he comes over occasionally. Well at about 10 pm one of my friends comes bouncing in the door telling us she had gone to the mall and asking if Jake was here yet. Immediatley alarms went off in my head, why would she care if Jake was coming over? Apparently he was coming over to get his hair cut. His sister usually cuts his hair but my friends wanted to practice on guys hair so she was going to cut it. I know she doesn't mean it but she is the biggest flirt alive. The second he came over she started flirting. I could feel myself getting sadder and sadder as I listened to them talk. She laughed and giggled. Told him about her shopping that day, how she is taking modern dancing, how she made that scarf herself. I could tell Jake was highly impressed. Heck she is skinny, beautiful, musically talented, has perfectly white pearly teeth, can cook, and crochet. The list goes on and on. Suddenly I couldnt stop the tears from coming. The realization hit me that as long as there were girls like her in this world, I would never be able to get a guy as good as Jake. I couldn't remember the last time I cried that hard. I didn't grow up quilting with other Mormons. I don't know the Book of Mormon like the back of my hand. The list of perfect Mormon girl qualities that I don't have went on and on. It hurt my feelings so bad that even though my friend had at least 6 different guys she likes right now, she still flirted with the one guy I do like. I know she didn't mean too, or thats what I tell myself. It seems as though everytime he comes over she magically shows up too. She doesn't talk to me while she is there she just flirts. I know she isn't trying to hurt me, but she is hurting me. I wish we were friends like we used to be but she changed. I don't know what changed, but we don't talk like we used to. I was just going to cry myself to sleep but suddenly I got so strong willed. I wasn't about to let people walk over me. I have been waiting to come here my whole life, and I wasn't going to spend four years here wishing I was something else. I tried to repair the damage the tears had done to my face, then I walked out there. I casually entered the conversation. I got in a better mood. Not a happy one but I wasn't crying either so that was something. Before he left I told him I had 2 tickets to Celtic Nights for the following night and that if he didn't have anything to do, I think he would like it. He told me he would like to come. By Friday morning I was determined to learn how to crochet, and knit. I was determined to learn how to dance. I was determined to learn to be the person I have always wanted to be. I was determined to learn how to play the piano. The list goes on. Thankfully there is such a thing as youtube which will teach me how to crochet and knit. I will become worth something. I am not talented now but you just wait. One day I will be the best wife and mother that has ever walked this earth. Being a good mother, that is my biggest dream in life. That is the thing that matters most to me. Maybe I don't have the coolest talents in the world. But that doesn't mean I am a piece of crap. That just means that a guy is going to have to look past the surface to see who I am. Friday I gave plasma. I never want to give plasma again. I was shaking I was so scared. Then I got sick and almost passed out. It was a really unpleasant experience, and I can honestly say I couldn't have been happier to get out of there. I then went and took my first college test and got a 96. That just made my day. Then I came home and got ready for Celtic Nights. Jake and I left at 7. It was fenomenal I wished my family was there because I knew they would have just loved it. I was absolutely amazed by their talent. After Celtic Nights we went out for Ice Cream and then came back to my apartment. I showed him a few magic tricks and then we were just hanging out talking with my other roommates when what do you know my friend shows up with her date. All I wanted was one night, but it had to be topped off with her flirting with all the guys in the room at the same time. I wasn't that upset though. I was annoyed but thats about the extent. He left and I decided to hit the hay. Today I am determined to start to learn. I am doing laundry right now and then I am going to go practice piano. Oh and btw I think I might get a job at a call center! I hope so anyways!
Love Ya! - Emily

Last night I hung out with some premies (pre-missionaries). I was very dissapointed. Its crazy how good I used to think guys were until I met this one guy whose light shined through his eyes like I've never seen before. You could see his love for christ when he talked. He glowed. Its something that I will never forget. Last night I was very sad about the fact that I would never be that perfect girl that the good guys are looking for. But last night as I was hanging out with Haley, Tauni, and 2 premies, I could feel the difference in the spirit. They were having a good time,they were laughing. From afar you wouldn't see anything wrong. But while I was with them the spirit was gone. I didn't have any desire to be with them. Even though they are only a little younger than me it felt like I was hanging out with a bunch of little kids who hadn't quite learned about what life could be yet. I refuse to settle for someone who doesn't have the light of Christ shining through their eyes. Because its like the difference between skim milk and whole milk. Why would you jip yourself if you knew there was better? This morning as I was thinking about it I realized something. I do not need to worry about finding guys who want me. I do not need to worry about not being good enough or perfect enough. What I need to focus on is coming to know Christ in such a way that when people look at me they will see the light of Christ shining through my eyes. When I have a Christ like countenance than I will draw the good guys naturally. I'm not going worry about guys. I have enough on my hands with college as is. Its not my call. If I meet a guy and HE likes me and I know that he has a love for this gospel and I want to give him a chance then thats one thing. But I am not here to live in a town that should be called match.com and freak out when I haven't found my match. Heck I am 19 years old. I have many many many years left in my life. All I know is that I am not here to impress people. I am no longer afraid to be who I am. I may not have many friends, but I am who I am. I have many imperfections, but that just means I am human. I don't want someone who sees me as perfect or who wants me to be perfect. I want someone who sees my imperfections, and respects me for who I am and still sees the good in me.
Last night I was so sad to find out that not everyone here abides by the honor code. Many of those who do, only abide by it because they are afraid of being caught.The boys we were hanging out with wanted to watch a movie however we only had an hour and a half until curfew. They asked: "Are your roommates strict on curfew?" My heart sunk when I heard that. They didn't ask how we felt about it but assumed we didn't care and was worried about our roommates. I suggested playing games instead. I told my roommate that I was not comfortable being late for curfew. I agreed to abide by the honor code when I came to this school. I told her that I signed a piece of paper promising that I would abide by the honor code and so did my branch president and stake president. It made me look like a goody to shoes. I know being a little late on a friday night shouldn't really matter, but it does to me. I can't be the best person that I want to be when I am breaking rules that are there to help me. If I didn't want all these rules I could have gone to s regular university. But I came here to be around others who believe the same that I do. Haley just got here so I've got to go.

Love you!

That awkward moment when you realize you aren't good enough for him. You wait your whole life for the opportunity to come to this school and be around other Mormons. You get so excited at all the prospects of being here. Then the world comes crashing down and you realize that it is not a school full of good return missionaries. There are many types of Mormons here. And the ones that you have waited for your whole life are either married or looking for someone better than you. You realize how crappy you are compared to many of the other girls. You didn't grow up a molly Mormon. You didn't wait till you were 16 to date. You have already had your first kiss. You don't know the book of mormon like the back of your hand. You can't braid in 12 different ways. You can't crochet, nit, and quilt. You aren't as innocent as everyone else. You are worldly compared to these other Mormon girls. These dream missionaries don't want someone as plain, boring and un-Mormon as me. I don't even reach the charts against these girls. So no matter how hard you try to be the best girl you can be, no matter how hard you try to impress them, or how hard you try to flirt without being to flirty. You will never get that guy. Because you aren't that girl he is looking for. I just want to cry because I feel like my hopes and dreams have been crushed. There are too many other girls to compete with. To many other girls who look nearly perfect. Who will be the perfect wives and mothers and relief society presidents. Tonight I am going to a dance, but why should I even go? I am afraid to flirt now. How can I if I know it ends in disappointment. I am not the perfect girl and I never will be. I can't get things out of my mouth the way I want to and I can't express myself without looking like an idiot. All I want to do is give up. But then where does that put me? No where thats where. I've never been able to get the good guys, so why do I still try? Shouldn't I have learned my lesson by now? I never learn.

Dear Blog,
It is Friday night and I do have plans to go out. I have to go out to keep myself sane. I seem to have gotten myself down though. We are going to a dance, and I can only hope it is something like a stake dance because I never did like school dances. I can't dance, not really anyways. I can slow dance and country dance but that is about the extent of my dancing. As the time passes, I want to go less and less. Tauni just came in and wants me to do something so I'll ttyl.
Love you!
Emily

College is here!

Dear blog,
I have now been in Rexburg a week and a half. I love it here. It is a lot of work, but I do love being in class again. I am taking all foundations classes and a confectionary course, which is working with chocolate and candy making. My roommates are all really nice. I get along great with them. Haley is right next to me in the neighboring apartment. People here are so spiritual it amazes me. Normally I would be answering questions in class and being interactive but I haven't been like that here. Other people are so smart and opinionated I don't dare raise my hand and look stupid. My Book of Mormon class is so amazing. We start out with a hymn and a prayer. The spirit is strong in there and everyone is so eager to discuss the book of mormon. Everyone has deep insights too. I met a boy that I like but I think it goes one way so I suppose I'll keep looking. I really don't have time for a boy anyway. It's going to be hard as it is to get good grades, and get a job. My only friends are my roommates and 2 other people Chantelle introduced me to when I first got here. Well I'm going to go work on more homework and do something productive. Or maybe I will relax and watch a movie... idk